It's been a year since I joined this family as the third wife. And what a year it's been! I willingly admit it hasn't always been easy or happy. But it's been an adventure, a satisfying one. Hubby tries very, very hard to make this a united and happy family. He is most tolerant and takes on much of the emotional burden and every day stress for all of us. This can leave us worried about him, his physical and mental health, as stress can be unhealthy.
I think we have a good marriage. We have two marriages, no we have ten marriages in total if you think about it. There is the marriage of two people (three of those) and then the marriage in total, giving each wife two marriages and hubby four. Wow. If you think about it that way, no wonder it's difficult at times. Think of how difficult just one marriage can be. I was in two monogamous marriages (well officially monogamous) before and believe me, it wasn't always easy.
But don't get me wrong here. It's also very enjoyable at times. During this year I moved in. That was an exciting time! I got to know two women much better than I had before. That wasn't always easy. I got in return for my efforts, three step children, a daughter - in - law and two step grandchildren. All of that in addition to my own brood of two plus a new grandchild. So my family has gotten much, much larger. I now get daily hugs and kisses from people of all ages!!
I am grateful in a way that isn't always tangible. I complain, I whine, I lament about compromise, sharing, noise, messiness, and lack of privacy. A recent anonymous poster commented on 3rd's blog that they are amazed at how plural women act as though they are shocked/surprised at their lot in life, or words to that affect. Well, yes duh. So what? To be honest here, there is no way one could prepare for all this unless they were born in to polygamy, and I wasn't. Would I choose this lifestyle for one of my children? I've been asked that question and the answer is probably not. Just as I wouldn't choose for one of my children to be "gay". But not because I disapprove of it, it is because it isn't for everyone and isn't the easiest path in life.
Am I always miserable and unhappy, hell no! I have a kind, considerate, and sometimes very romantic husband and a wonderful extended family. I have everything I need in life...well I could use more privacy, but nothing is absolutely perfect now is it?
Life is good. It beats the alternative and it's better than before.