Thursday, October 6, 2011


I doubt I've ever mentioned some personal things about me that in retrospect may help in eventually understanding why a woman gives up everything near and dear to her to move FAR away and in to a plural marriage..although, the plural part is only part of it, as you may have realized by now.

For starters, I suffer from depression. I think throughout my life it has been an issue but became more acute as my children and I lived in an unhappy, stressful home. I never took medication for it until approximately 7 or 8 years ago. I did however occasionally see a therapist through the years. In other ways I handle stress well. I had an extremely stressful career for 15 years and for the most part was successful and enjoyed the work. Before that I worked for a small newspaper and loved, loved the grind to a deadline type of atmosphere there. I've worked on political campaigns and trust me they are more stressful than you can imagine. Anyway, I have depression. I have been off the meds for about 3 months now and have noticed that little things, like one of my adult children having a problem (not necessarily a big problem btw) can trigger weeping. So I'm on a search for a doctor. I need a doctor here in this location anyway.

I am indecisive. Please don't ask me to pick the restaurant or the flight time or anything else. Give me at the most 2 choices! Better yet, you decide. Because of this I think parts of my life have been left to others. If you read older posts you'll see how that has affected me. For instance, not moving in to my own house when I joined hubby and his 2 other wives. BIG MISTAKE.

I have trouble letting things go. Getting better at this when it comes to small stuff but still I have a tendency to go on and on about some things, especially in my head. This as you can imagine sometimes leads to insomnia, and lately along with my cancer medication and my age... I worry.

I hate the cold! Hate it. One of the things I looked forward to when I moved across the country 3 and a half years ago was the warmer climate. In a perfect world I would live in Mexico. I'm a beach person, unfortunately where I moved to was far from any beach. Now I'm near the ocean but the weather has turned. I used to like autumn but not so much anymore I'm discovering. I am a summer person.

I wrote for a living for quite a long time and thus sometimes I just want to write and write. So sorry to bore you with all this personal, not really poly type stuff. Did I mention I miss my real breasts?

1 comment:

Older and Weiser said...

I am glad that you are sharing other things about yourself. It is your blog, to say whatever you want. Besides, your decision to live poly is in part because of the many facets of Y-O-U. All of your choices are effected by who you are and what you are feeling.

I find it refreshing that you are willing to share so much about yourself. THANK YOU!