Thursday, October 9, 2008

Schedules...a necessary evil?

I am reprinting a post I wrote back in July. when the "schedule" we had was something like this..I had Mondays and Wednsdays, #2 had Thursday and Fridays, #1 had Tuesday and Saturdays and we alternated Sundays. The whole schedule concept was MY idea in the first place. Remember dear reader, basically I had moved in to a home that was reminiscent of a 1960's "hippy" bohemian lifestyle. As with anything new or different, it takes time to make the necessary adjustments..this post points that out!

I've Had it With The Damn Schedule! - July 25
Yes you read the title of topic of this post correctly. I've had it with the damn schedule. Not that it's going to change anytime in the next millenium but I'm going to make a valid attempt ... any day now.

See, the schedule was brought up by me. Validated by me. Now, I see the mistakes in it but I don't know that anyone else does. I finally had a screaming match with S the other night and boy oh boy did it feel GOOD. I'm not ashamed to say that either. She and I have been getting along better, some. I've been trying and she's been trying and maybe I've learned how to tune her out, some. However...... change is not something she takes to. I thought I had a problem with change! Compared to her I'm practically a chameleon. It may just be the one characteristic she and R have in common. The hatred of change.

T's dad was having surgery on Monday and on Monday and Tuesday (her night) she was staying at her parent's house about an hour away to help out. Wednsday is my night, when she would be returning. So I offered to switch with her so she wouldn't miss one of her days this week. Later on Tuesday when S came home from work I told her that T and I had worked it out this way and she was all well not upset but questioning it and didn't seem happy. Later that night when T called R and reminded him and told him about the switch he said he didn't know we had worked it out and wished we had informed him earlier. "Now S has to sleep alone two nights in a row, she's not going to be happy." Well. A "discussion"broke out between T, me and S wiht T on the phone. It wasn't pleasant. S kept saying how she wasn't "used" to sleeping alone two nights in a row, etc. I blew my top at her. R, wisely, stayed out of it.

My thinking now is to say the schedule stinks and needs to be revisited and instead of actual days of the week, have the schedule be every other night, or third night. And this way, no one always has Saturday or Friday night etc.

T agrees with me. But I fear she is the only one. No, I know she is the only one.

So, we shall see how long it takes me to convince S of the fairness of this new kind of schedule. Don't let's hold our breath.

Intellectually I still believe in a schedule, and emotionally too. It just isn't easy to stick to it all the time.

Since writing that post, I suceeded in getting the schedule changed to an every third night type of schedule. Much, Much better :) HOWEVER, both hubby and #2 get confused or annoyed or upset, whenever anyone requests a switch or change of any kind. Jeesh! Frankly, I don't care. The schedule we are on now is much happier, and fairer! If you don't already know, the schedule means this in our house - if it's your day/night, and you are home, you supposedly get some quality alone time with hubby...a movie perhaps, just sitting talking, a shopping trip for groceries or sundries, maybe a dinner out or a lunch, watching a tv show, whatever floats your collective boat. You also sleep together that night. Bear in mind that in a family this size, if alone time wasn't scheduled it may never happen :)

1 comment:

Sasha Ricci said...

WOW...I like the "every third night" better. I am one that is a true chameleon and change doesn't bother me...but for #2 (right?) to freak out...I've been playing catch up on your blog and she seems most unreasonable! Kudos to you for being able to stick it out...cause man, I don't like her just reading your blog let alone being able to live with her!